too many thoughts...

I've had a really good day today despite a pounding headache. I finally gave in & took some Midol. It worked it's magic. But as the day has gone on, I've had two thoughts in my head. 1. How much love I feel for so many different people in my life. And 2. Two of my biggest pet peeves. I don't know why I keep thinking of them but I do. Maybe because they both happened this week. 

These two thoughts have absolutely nothing to do with the other but I can't get either of them out of my head. I won't talk about love right now. It's too sappy. Are you wondering what my pet peeves are? I don't have many. But these two really bug me. First, I CAN'T STAND when people drive down a street below the speed limit, especially if there is more than one lane & each lane has someone going slow! Now I have to say that I am a pretty patient driver. It takes a lot to bother me while I'm driving but this drives me bananas, especially in the 40 mph zone on 320th. I seriously want to yell out my window "SPEED UP!" I want to lay on my horn! I want to push their car with my car. But I don't do any of this. I just seethe to myself & try to set a good example to those around me. But ugh, it drives me crazy! 

My other pet peeve... snacks during sacrament at church. I totally understand if you have a small child, I'm talking two & under, that needs a snack. If they are old enough to be in Primary, they don't need a snack. I get it if a treat helps keep your 13 month old or however old quiet during talks. I have a small child. I will bring him snacks most assuredly. BUT I WILL CLEAN UP THE MESS THAT HE MAKES AND NOT LEAVE IT IN THE SEAT FOR THE NEXT PERSON TO CLEAN UP! I got to church on Sunday and went to our usual place. Well, new usual place. I have decided that I don't like the benches & refuse to sit there anymore. But that's a whole other post. Anyway, when I went to sit down, every chair in that row had a ton of crumbs on it. I'm talking a lot. I couldn't believe it. It was a mess. I wanted to say "The church is not your house. Clean up your mess!" At first it made me mad. But as I thought about it, it saddened me. Did this person or persons not have enough respect for the Lord's house to just quickly pick up after themselves? I guess not. I cleaned up the bench. Now I would usually give someone the benefit of the doubt but I have seen this too often in the chapel. It really bothers me. It's sad. As someone who used to clean the church building almost every Saturday with Rich, it's a lot of work cleaning the chapel. But I love doing it. I wish that everyone had to clean the chapel at least once so that they could feel the spirit that is present when it is unoccupied and so quiet. I know that I shouldn't let this bother me & as I write this, I'm finding myself actually letting it go... So, I won't think about it anymore (that is until the next time it happens. ha!). No, no, no, I will just keep cleaning it up & hopefully not judge or let it become a pet peeve. :)  I'm always a work in progress...

Today I love that I was able to shop at the Costco Business Center. It rocks!

Dauntless

You will understand the title of this post as soon as you go buy this book! And read it!

This is my favorite book at the moment. I have already read it twice! The next one in the series comes out in May. I am counting down the days!

I had the chance to talk about it tonight with a few friends & they ALL felt great love for this book. I won't spoil anything for you by talking about it here. Just read it! :)

3 things...

Today I have seen quite a few friends post on Facebook what they are thankful for this day. It made me think of things that I am thankful for. Besides my family & the blue sky outside, I am thankful for these things the most today...

No, I am not thankful for PMS. I'm so thankful for Midol. The monster in me was clawing it's way out this morning. But I swallowed two of these little pills. It gave that monster a good kick in the head & kept it buried deep within me. Thank you modern medicine!

source

A hot shower! The hot water running down my back helped ease the pain that I have been feeling. It was relaxing & got me clean as a whistle! 

I left his number on here because if you need a repair, he is the man to call!

A handy man! Where would we be if these smart men did not exist?!!! Our washer broke on Monday. Not good. Bruce made it to my house today. Gave our washer a new part. And cost me $100. Excellent! He say's our washer should work for years to come. 

 

There are many more things that I am thankful for but without these 3, today would have been a very different day!

 

 

Today I love fake spiders. Kira has had fun decorating with them for Halloween.

love...

Want to know how much my husband loves me? I'll tell you. While I was at the Counting Crows concert, he sat through a hour & a half long demonstration for a Kirby vacuum cleaner! No, he didn't buy it but he did get my front room carpet shampooed for free. Woo hoo! Well, not exactly free. He did have to listen to a man talk about what an amazing machine this Kirby is. He had to feel the pressure of buying one. He had to hold Jace in his lap & make sure that Kira & Garret were entertained while he sat hearing all about the magical tricks this sucking machine is capable of. He actually got the guy down to half the price, which was still over a thousand dollars but only "$50 a month! Unheard of!" He didn't let the salesman know that I had just ordered a Dyson, even though the salesman compared his fantastic contraption to the ever powerful Dyson. Rich lost time in his life that he will never get back. And he did it for me, so that I would have nice clean carpet in our front room. Thank you my sweet husband! I love you!

I made these today. They are good. Really good.

If you want an easy, tasty, & rich cupcake make these. It's the Hershey's recipe on the back of the cocoa container. Cake & frosting. Simple. Don't bake as long as it says. They will turn out dry.  I only bake them 18 minutes.

I love cupcakes. They are the perfect size. Perfect treat!

Goals

So I've been thinking that I need to come up with a couple of goals to meet each week. But I hesitate to do it. You see, I'm the type that doesn't like pressure. When I feel too much pressure being put on me, I shut down & just don't do anything at all. It's something I've done for a long time. Or, I wait until the very last possible minute to get whatever is pressuring me done. I usually do an okay job, but I'm full of anxiety until it is completed.

So I'm thinking that if I just pick two small goals each week and post them here, then I will have more motivation to complete them. And hopefully complete them early in the week. It will put pressure on me but I'm hoping that actually writing them down and letting someone know about the goals will help me be able to achieve them.

Here goes...

1. Clean out Garret & Jace's room. I need to pack away the clothes that are too small. Give the DI over half of the toys that are in there. And go through Garret's books.

2. Get the Halloween decorations out. I love Halloween!

I don't think those are too tough. I can do this! Things always seem to get in the way when I set goals like this for myself. But hopefully, I can push those things aside and get these two goals completed. I don't feel too much pressure since these aren't such huge goals but they are ones that need to get done!

I'm starting out small. Wish me luck!

sleep? what's that?

Today has been a great day but I am SO TIRED! Jace has been a little sick this week. Kira was a little sick this week. I have been a little sick this week. Our house is a wreck. It's been kinda rough but I've hung in there & the kids are feeling better. Tonight though, I am exhausted. It made me think of this...

She it so describing me in this song right now!

And then tomorrow it will be like this...

That's the life of a mom, right? Even though it makes me crazy sometimes, I really wouldn't have it any other way!

update... It's 10 minutes  later & I just had to clean up puke. Remember President Uchtdorf, remember President Uchtdorf, see the beauty of now, remember President Uchtdorf...

thankful

I am so thankful for President Uchtdorf's talk at the Relief Society General Conference. It made me feel less crazy about some parts of my life. I think it made quite a few women feel that way. 

showering

have you ever tried to shower with a 10 month old looking in on you? It's tough! Jace kept pulling the shower curtain back this morning so that he could climb in with me! I finally just had to shower with the curtain only drawn half way. I had to point the water straight down so that it didn't get the whole bathroom wet or get him soaking wet. He just smiled his cute smile & kept trying to climb in. Funny kid! It was quite the shower this morning! 

source...

frustrated

You know, for the most part, I am happy with who I am. There are things that I am working on like the crazy mental momma that seems to pop up whenever it feels like it. I try to keep her trapped. But mostly, I'm happy with my life. I try hard to be a good mom, wife, friend, sister, daughter, all the things that I am. I'm not nearly perfect but I'm trying to do the best I can. The best I know how. So why is it that someone can get under my skin so easily? I shouldn't care what they think. I know who I am and how I'm trying to live my life. I shouldn't care that they think I shouldn't say such & such or do this or that. But for some reason, I let them get to me. It brings me down. It makes me sad. But I don't know how to let it go or get rid of it! I want to tear those feelings out of me & throw them in the garbage but I just can't figure out how to do it. Maybe it's just with time. I don't know. It's frustrating.

my morning walk

I really enjoy going on walks, especially with other people. This morning, however, I went alone. Usually I don't listen to music because I like to pay attention to my surroundings. But I listened to music this morning. I had a blast. Now you know this is some kind of walk if I was alone & was able to have a good ole time. I started out just fine listening to a song & then a conference talk. The talk was uplifting. Then it was back to music. When I listen to music and walk at the same time, I get so caught up in the music that I don't pay attention to things around me. A lady jogged right up next to me & I didn't even notice her until she said "hi." It made me jump. She just smiled and went on her merry way. Now, I was walking down 320th, a fairly busy rode. I had to really concentrate on not breaking out in some serious dance moves while on that rode or singing out loud. The people passing by would be wondering what mental hospital I escaped from if I busted a move right there on the sidewalk. Boy did I want to, especially when a Shakira song came on. I love some Shakira. Finally I made it into the neighborhood where there weren't as many cars and just let myself go. I sang my heart out in Spanish to those couple of Shakira songs. Despite being half Mexican, I have no clue what over half of the words mean but I was enjoying singing right along with her. A man walking a dog came around the corner and almost stopped so that he could watch me. I just smiled at him & kept on going. He gave me a big smile back. It was funny. Then what do you know, a Beastie Boy's song came on. Now, this white girl can rap with the best of 'em. I'm sure I looked awesome rappin' down the street. I'm cool like that. I'm down with some Skeelo. I'm old skool like that! Ha! Anyway, I had a lot of people smile at me. I think they could tell that I was enjoying my morning walk. I was almost home when I was singing to something else. I don't remember what it was but I totally wasn't paying attention. I finally looked up & there was a man running right at me. It scared me to death! He just laughed. I'm glad that I was able to put smiles on people's faces this morning!

Today, I love this song... It reminds me of my childhood!

Singing praises to...

this is my very favorite kind of sour cream. you can't even tell this it's light!

That's right! Sour cream. I love this stuff. Kind of a weird post, I know. But you can put this stuff in practically anything. Of course there are the usual baked potatoes & casseroles. I use it in mashed potatoes. I won't usually touch mashed potatoes unless there is gravy to go along with them but add a little of this and that pot of potatoes taste so much better. I love it for jalapeno poppers & quesadillas. I use it in a lot of my cake recipes. It makes your cake so moist without effecting the flavor. Yesterday, I made baked potatoes for dinner. As I was dressing Garret's potato (he loves this stuff too), Rich called the sour cream "sour disgusting." Usually he calls it "sour yucky." It was funny because this little ingredient is in so many foods that I prepare & he gobbles that food right up. I guess he only hates it on it's own. Love ya Rich! So on Saturday night, I had some very ripe raspberries that I needed to use up quick. I found this recipe and gave it a try. It was so yummy! And so simple! Rich had no idea he was even eating sour cream! And I still haven't told him. Guess he will know now. :) 

I loved this recipe! Give it a try!

McDonald's

So, I usually love McDonald's. I know that I shouldn't but I do. I know that it's filled with bad things like special sauce, deep fried french fries, & soft serve ice cream. But oh how I love those bad things! Last night we stopped at McD's for dinner since we had no time to make any after ballet & before the football game. Usually, I just get a small burger & of course some fries. But last night, I got a big mac. Come on, they were buy one get one free! That's a bargain, right? And no! I did not eat both of them. My big strong strapping husband was with me. He had one. Needless to say, but that dang big mac was so good! And the fries, delicious. Well, since I had already indulged in that tasty badness, I proceeded to have a snickers at the game. And I had a some of Rich's popcorn too. So much for eating good... I will tell you that I enjoyed all of that food. But today, I am paying for it. I've had a belly ache all day. So, I'm getting back on the wagon. Fruits & vegetables are my friend, not McDonald's. Ya think I can go a week without it? That's my challenge for the week. No McD's! Here's to dreaming! For dinner tonight, I am making chinese beef with broccoli. I hope it's good!

Friday night

It's not often that Rich has a Friday night off from work. Last night he did & it was great! We went to a local high school football game with the kids and had a really fun time. Being at the game brought back some memories of my high school years. I went to most of the h.s. football games my sophmore year of school. They were fun. But as I got older, I lost interest. I went to one game my sr year and that was to watch my good friend play. I always liked the games, just never the crowd. But last night, I loved it. The energy was high. The students were excited. The band was loud. It was great! 

Before the game, Kira had her first ballet lesson. I can't express the excitement that was coming from her. She wanted to go as soon as preschool was over yesterday. But she had to wait... It was a little bit emotional watching my cute little girl dancing her heart out in class. She smiled the whole way through it. And I thought that she looked like a little angel in her ballet clothes. Garret even liked watching her but to get him to admit that...  

Yesterday was a good day. I was able to focus on the blessings that I have in my life. Negatives kept trying to make their way into my thinking but I beat them down. Practice make perfect, right?

I'm sure I will be practicing for a long time to come. It's all about being refined.

Thanks

I just want to say thanks to some of the wonderful people that are in my life. I have had so many positive responses to this blog. I know I sound crazy at times but it's been nice to hear that you understand. And I'm glad that I sound just like some of you! :)  We are the same! Thanks for being positive and helping me along. I love you!

understanding

The past few days, I've been thinking alot about how many people are so misunderstood. It's funny how everyone has their own interpretation of things. You may feel the exact same way as your friend about a certain situation & someone one else may feel completely different about it. I've been trying to figure out reasons why something so simple sometimes can cause such different reactions. 

I have sort of decided that there are 4 kinds of people in my life. 

1. There are those that can't believe you would say or do something like "that!" I have the hardest time with this type. They are usually the ones that are quick to judge and not even try to understand the situation or ask about it. They just jump to conclusions. They usually think their opinions are the only correct ones out there and that they are smarter than everyone else when in reality, they are not. And they don't share anything about their lives because, heaven forbid, someone find out that there life isn't perfect. I don't have time for this type, so I usually limit my interactions with them. 

2. There are those that understand everything you are going through or at least try. They have either been through it, are going through it, or have watched someone else go through it. They are not judgmental. They are understanding. They will talk to you openly and not make you feel crazy or stupid. They love you no matter what. I appreciate these kinds of people.

3. There are those that don't really care either way. The just accept you for what you are and go on. Nothing much really fazes them. They don't often judge. They just don't waist time on it. They can laugh at situations that others would be mad or upset about. They don't care much for confrontation. They are usually content with their lot in life. It makes them very easy to be around. I like these people. I want to be like them too.

4. There are those that just want attention. They blow things way out of proportion. They overreact to almost every situation. It's maddening. 

I want to be a mix of 2 & 3. I'm working on it. 

Rich & I were having a conversation the other night about people. He asked me "Besides your family, who is your favorite person at the moment?" I thought about it and gave him my answer. I think he understood why. He just smiled & said "but they kind of have some weird ideas." I just laughed & agreed. But at the moment, I love this person so much it brings tears to my eyes. 

Then he asked who my least favorite person was. I couldn't answer. I'm trying not to dwell on the negative people right now. I don't have time for that kind of thinking. He understood.


Today I am extra thankful for my mom. She likes my blog, understands what I'm going through, & is a great example of charity.

crazy momma

Have you ever been through a period in your life where you just feel crazy? That was me a couple weeks back. Reading back through this blog, I'm kinda laughing at myself. I was a little unstable. Things have definitely gotten better. I'm sure plenty of you thought "what in the world is wrong with her?" I did. I could not figure out what was wrong with me. But that's just life. Sometimes things are great & other times, things seem terrible. Well, I've decided to refocus my energy. I remember a talk at a baptism once. The lady speaking said to think about how the world would be if women would pray twice a day and read their scriptures at least five minutes each day. I think I'm going to try it out. I could really use a spiritual boost each day, especially in the morning. As I sit here writing this, I can't help but think about how grateful I am for my kids and my husband. They are honestly the best family. I couldn't ask for anything better. They love me despite my faults. And I love them with all my heart. 

So, I'm going to set some goals and focus on the positive. I need to get the negative out of my life, including people. For example... I have a free subscription to US Weekly. Each time it comes, I sit down and look through it. Each time, I feel terrible about myself. You read my hair post, right? Well, that is where a lot of it stemmed from. The girls (not all but most) in that magazine are all stick skinny & are always shimmering. They have perfect clothes. They have perfect hair where they want it and no hair where they don't. It's a trend that has fallen on us "everyday people" and it makes me feel bad about the way that I am. So, that magazine will be going away. There is nothing positive in it for me. I don't even know who half the people in it are anyway. I'm going to stick to my Family fun magazine. I want to be around positive people too. I have really great friends here that always help me. I want to help them. 

I think if I do these few things, it is a start on a better positive attitude. I want to be happy for my family and for myself.

pedometer

For the past two weeks, I have been wearing my pedometer again. It's great! It's amazing how one little thing can motivate you in so many ways. I'm trying each day to get at least 12,000 steps. Except Sundays. That is my day off. Before I got pregnant with Jace, I was up to around 18,000 steps a day. If I got 15,000, I was fine with that but anything below that was not good. But now, I would love to get that 15,000 with no problem. Hopefully I will get back there soon. NO, I will get back there soon! 

this isn't my exact one but you get the idea...

 And more than just getting steps in, it reminds to eat better. I don't diet. Anymore. I've tried. Multiple times. I hate counting calories. I hate keeping track of points. I can't do it. I'm done with it. But wearing the pedometer reminds me of what I want to be, healthy and strong. So in turn, I make better choices about the foods that I do eat. And right now I am really loving hummus. It's delicious. I like knowing that I need to get up and move so that the number on my pedometer increases & in order to do that, I need good food. I read in a fitness magazine "Dieting makes you look good in clothes. Exercising makes you look good naked." I want to look good naked. You know, just in case I decide to prance around in front of the windows at night in all my natural glory. I'm sure the neighbors would appreciate some cheap entertainment. 

Another plus to wearing this simple little contraption, is that I feel better mentally. Going on these walks/runs everyday have helped me a lot. I'm happier. It's a stress reliever. My family appreciates it. I am a much more gentle & loving creature!

Today I loved seeing Garret & Kira having fun together at the fair. It made my heart happy.

hair

I'm gonna vent a little. Why has it become the "thing" now for girls to have absolutely no hair on their body except for on their head and eyebrows. I don't completely get it.  Don't get me wrong, I get my eyebrows waxed. I want them to look nice. I don't want a unibrow. But I don't think I should get rid of all the hair on my body. Everyone I know is getting lasered, super waxed, or shaving off any hair they have. It bugs me. What's wrong with the hair on my arms?!! I totally understand if you are super hairy to the point of it being unattractive & you need to fix it up a bit. But to get rid of everything seems silly to me. First girls have to be skinny, not thin, skinny. I think super skinny girls are ugly. Ribs sticking out are not cute. And now, we have to be completely hairless. Ugh. I don't want to shave my arms. And I don't want to look like a 4 year old girl either (if you know what I mean). I just think it is weird. I've fallen to peer pressure & tried it. I don't like it. I think there is something very feminine & sexy about looking like a woman and not a little girl. Maybe I am just weird. I hate the pressure that has come on women, especially young girls, to look a certain way. I look at some of the women around me, who have had kids or are worn with age & I think they are beautiful. They have pudge on their bodies & wrinkles around their eyes. They smile & laugh. They're confident. They are beautiful. Maybe that is something that only comes with age.  I also see others who have had kids and are getting older who think that they have to do all of these crazy things to stay looking young and be super skinny. Botox is completely stupid to me. But to each his own, I guess. I'm just really glad that I have a husband who thinks I really don't need to get my eyebrows waxed & doesn't mind some hair on my body.



Today I love my hands... They aren't very strong. They have arthritis. But they work.

my mouth is watering

because today I am going here...

and I am eating this...

SO EXCITING!!!

need to but don't want to...

I'm tired. I need to go to bed. I stayed up late last night watching the last Harry Potter for the 3rd time. I love it. And I was with a friend, so it was that much more fun. I went to bed when I got home from the movie but I had to get up a few times with Jace during the night. He didn't sleep well and every little noise he made, woke me up. I got up early this morning too. Well, I woke up early. Garret & Jace actually got out of bed around 7 and I stayed in bed until 7:30. I let them have some playtime together. Garret likes taking care of Jace. Anyway, I'm rambling. Because I'm tired. But I don't want to go to bed because this is the only quiet time I get in the day & I don't want to waste it on sleeping. I want to search the internet, read a book, watch tv without it being on cartoons. I want to only think about what I want to think about, which sometimes is nothing at all. So, I'm off now to watch some adult tv. I'll probably fall asleep on the couch.

I love my couch!

1st day of school

So today Garret went back to school. He's a big 3rd grader. I can't believe it! I almost cried when I left him today. He walked into his classroom talking with friends. I think that I was forgotten at that point. Makes me sad, but I'm glad that he is excited. Last night he & Rich were talking about school when Garret asked for a blessing. It was a very sweet Father's blessing. I cried of course, but I didn't let Garret see. I am so thankful for Rich and the awesome dad that he is. I think we are both surprised at how fast time goes by. Our kids are getting big! I really hope that Garret loves school this year. I miss him already.

But...................... I suddenly feel a little more relaxed. I don't feel nearly as much pressure to entertain my kids now. Jace should now get regular naps with no interruptions. . Kira will have some quiet time. She starts preschool in another week. Woo hoo! And hopefully, I can catch up on things at home. I think that once I get our home cleaned the way that I want it, it will ease some of my mentally insane issues & take some of the pressure off of me that I am constantly feeling. Well at least I'm hoping it does. I have to say that yesterday things were great. I didn't yell or lose it at all. We were supposed to go the movies with some friends but Garret really wanted to go to the zoo. Sooo, that's what we did. We skipped out on the movies and a birthday party and just spent the day together. It was so much fun. Kira & Garret got along great. No one fought about anything. Jace was happy. I let the kids lead me around the zoo. We looked at the sharks for a long time, twice. It was fun. I needed a good day with my kids & I got it.

Today I want these shoes! BAD! maybe for Christmas???

Keen Women's Bern Baby Bern Boot